Yes, there where times in my life when I had lost a big part of my faith in God. This is why in the beginning, I had many doubts when I first read certain spiritual books.
In the beginning, I had to admit to myself that my relationship with God was half-hearted; and that I did not really know how to pray to God correctly. The books I found helped me in these first steps.
Over the years on this path, one thing became clear to me: if we pray for healing, God really does answer us. One of the main reasons why healing seems to take longer in some situations, has to do with trust - or: with our lack of trust.
For example, I learned Reiki when I was young, but when I do Reiki today, it is a different thing: because I learned to trust in Divine Guidance. When our devotion to God, to our Divine Source, is truly complete, then we can observe healilngs.
This demands that we step aside, lay down our ego, all our expectations, and allow God to work through us. Divine Love knows what to do and what is best. As long as we project our personal ideas and beliefs on how things should happen in that situation we prayed for, then we will only see little results. Our surrender and our love to God should be complete, same as our devotion to God's guidance. It is about building a strong and solid relationship with God, and make this our first priority.
Another point is this: often when we pray for something, then we walk away too fast. After our prayers, we should wait and be still, so we can listen on all levels of our being and receive God’s answers. Listening to God with an open heart, in an inner awareness and love, until we feel we have received his answers.
One more key has to do with the messengers who sometimes bring us Gods answers: answers to our prayers come in all possible forms. But if we judge the people who God uses to bring us his support, we could fail in receiving his blessings. We have to stay open minded.
Another piece that is often hindering our healing and is hidden: old feelings of guilt and shame. We sometimes feel unworthy of God’s Love, as long as we still have thoughts of guilt. This is an important thing to work on, if you want to receive healing from God.
Please remember: lasting healing on the physical and mental levels rarely happens, when we are willing to really forgive others and ourselves. Many things can heal, when we let go of old anger, pride, resentment and blame.
If you are at a point in your life where you think that "nothing is working" and it’s not getting any better, know that we all have experienced these things along the path. Sometimes it is old karma, sometimes there are other reasons....
You may try this technique for nine days, a novena:
Sit in meditation and pray for Divine Guidance. Imagine a beautiful temple with a big altar in the middle. Now put everything on that altar, all burdens, including all your plans, all your emotional pain, all repressed emotions, all unfulfilled dreams, all goals and all your sorrows. Give all your anger, despair, all that grief, the guilt, the shame, all your wishes and everything you believed to be, to do and to have in your life now on that altar; and surrender everything to God. Let it all go. Do not hold back anything. Really give everything completely into the hands of God, your Divine Source, your Divine Creator. Then pray to God and the Angels for healing. Ask Him to correct your mind, to help you understand His answers, to heal your heart and your Soul. You may pray for forgiveness, and ask God to fill you with His Divine Consciousness. Ask God to fill your whole being with His Divine Peace. And then, say to God that you are ready to receive His Love and to follow His plans for your life -- if you are really ready to give up your own plans.
Simply repeat these steps for nine days, do this novena. Open your heart to receive God's answers. Sit in stillness several times a day and say, “Father God, I am listening to you, speak to me now, thank you for your guidance, …”
God loves You. Your Divine Self loves you and wants to return into Oneness with you, so you can follow the higher plans for your life.
This book from Joel S. Goldsmith is one of the precious books that can help you on this path:
The Art of Spiritual Healing.
And another beautiful book is this one, truly unique and very precious:
A Course in Understanding and Acceptance
Feel free to write me if you have any questions and wish to talk.